Mars Bars.....with Almonds!

My friend asked me to go to the shop with her after our coffee the other day, which I did. Oddly enough, we virtually had the entire supermarket to ourselves (I’d like to point out to my UK friends, that this was a Danish supermarket, which is nothing, nothing like a UK supermarket. Think more…..Costcutter. It really would be odd if you had the entirety of Safeways to yourself. More '28 Days Later', than odd). This, however, is quite beside the point. We wandered off to look around, and I came across something I’ve not seen since I was about 14 and in France. As I’m sure you can tell by the title of this entry (I think I was trying to build suspense for a minute there, which I then realised is totally pointless), was Mars bars, with almonds in them. Have you ever had them? They’re incredible. I first had them, as said, when I was 14, and I hated Mars bars. But these….oh my God. It’s something else entirely. So there they were. In a pack of 5. I couldn’t decide if I should buy them or not, but I was told that life is too short to worry about that (which I was also told by someone else last night, while debating whether or not to have a piece of carrot cake or not. I might end up very fat), so I bought them. My dear friend then said that I could just hide them in my fridge when I got home, and I’d forget all about them. Right. I don’t know if that works for other people, but it’s totally pointless for me.

I got home, put them in the top shelf of the door, so I couldn’t even see them, and carried on with my things. From that moment on, MARS BAR kept popping into my head in the middle of sentences, spoken or thought, and my eyes kept being pulled, as if on tiny Mars bar magnets (that makes no sense whatsoever), to the fridge. This was Tuesday. I had half after dinner. Then followed that half with another half. Then I had one on Wednesday night. Then I had one Thursday night. Then one at Friday lunchtime, and one Friday evening. Now, I know I’m not the size of a cow, and I know that I’m not going to die from this sudden overdose on chocolate, but I’m pretty sure that 5 Mars bars in 4 days just isn’t all that great. Do you remember the old song? ‘A Mars a day helps you work, rest and play!’ I even remember the advert. Look! Here it is:

Now, if I were still…however old I was then (8), I wouldn’t care, as I wouldn’t know any difference, but now I do care. And I curse Netto for bringing them back into my life. Like cigarettes, one night stands and Tequila, they are a guilty pleasure for the moments they last, but always remembered with slight disbelief. I am talking about 5 Mars bars here, mind you. Not one. And at least I can remember the name of the chocolate bar. Mix all of the above together, and there would be a good chance I wouldn’t. There would also be a good chance that I would throw up.